Being "Wrong"

"Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are: precious life lessons that can only be learned the hard way. Unless it's a fatal mistake, which, at least, others can learn from."

--Al Franken

"Oh, the Things I Know," 2002

 

It is election season and I am a Facebook user; therefore, I have been exposed to a lot ideas and opinions that conflict with my own in the past few months. This time around, I decided to keep my opinions to myself and observe my own reactions and assumptions when someone thinks differently than me. It has been extremely eye-opening! 

During my observations of myself, I have often reflected on the following fascinating TED Talk by author Kathryn Schulz. I watched it over a year ago and loved it so much I purchased and read the corresponding book, Being Wrong: Adventures in the Margin of Error. It is so interesting how very "right" she is about being wrong!  

What I learned about myself from simply paying attention to my thoughts and reactions with the "Series of Unfortunate Assumptions" in mind has helped me to be more tolerant and entertain different ideas without being offended by them. I have also learned to value the diversity of thought out there. It's incredible how we can all experience the same things and come away with as many different perspectives as there are stars in the sky! 

In the past, I have been guilty of making all three of the Unfortunate Assumptions (below). Have you? If so, have you ever wondered why? If you're brave enough to ask yourself the question, your answer will most likely shift your paradigm for the better, like it did mine. Enjoy!

======================================================

Excerpt from TED Talk, "On Being Wrong," by Kathryn Schulz. 

(Video of Talk in its entirety below excerpt.)  

======================================================

Think for a moment about what it means to feel right. It means that you think that your beliefs just perfectly reflect reality. And when you feel that way, you’ve got a problem to solve: How are you going to explain all of those people who disagree with you? It turns out most of us explain those people the same way -- by resorting to:

1. The Ignorance Assumption: They must not have the same information as you. 
2. The Idiocy Assumption: They have the same information, but are too moronic to put the pieces of the puzzle together properly.
3. The Evil Assumption: They know the truth and they are deliberately distorting it for their own malevolent purposes.

This is a catastrophe! This attachment to our own rightness keeps us from preventing mistakes when we absolutely need to, and causes us to treat each other terribly. To me, what's most baffling and tragic about this is that it misses the whole point of being human. It's like we want to imagine that our minds are these perfectly translucent windows and we just kind of gaze out of them and describe the world as it unfolds. And we want everybody else to gaze out of the same window and see the exact same thing. That is not true! And if it were, the world would be incredibly boring!

 

The miracle of your mind isn’t that you can see the world as it is. It’s that you can see the world as it isn’t. We can remember the past, we can think about the future and we can imagine what it's like to be some other person, in some other place.

St. Augustine said, "Fallor ergo sum: I err, therefore I am." Augustine understood that our capacity to screw up - it's not some kind of embarrassing defect in the human system; something we can eradicate or overcome. It's totally fundamental to who we are.

We need to step out of that tiny, terrified space of "rightness" and look around at each other. And look out at the vastness and complexity and mystery of the universe. And be able to say, "Wow...I don't know...maybe I'm wrong."  

--Kathryn Schulz

Related Posts:  

Beauty and the Beast

Got Glue?

Infinite Human Stupidity

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

-Albert Einstein 

"Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped." 

--Elbert Hubbard

I was waiting in the line at the supermarket, when one of the headlines on the magazine rack caught my eye.  It was the June/July 2011 issue of the Reader's Digest and the headline was, "The World's Dumbest: Criminals, Celebrities, Lawsuits, Tweets and More." I was instantly reminded of the quotes above, so I picked it up. I've always been a fan of the Darwin Awards website and have been thinking I'd pick an especially hilarious awardee to go along with my "Stupid quotes" (as I call them),  but I haven't done it because I've been unable to reconcile the death factor associated with the Darwin Awards (the whole premise of the awards is that the act of stupidity lead to death, thereby aiding natural selection and evolving the species by ridding the world of their stupidity).  The concept is a little harsh. And since one does not have to die to be stupid sometimes, I prefer the Reader's Digest version.  I'll post a few of my favorites from the article, but you'll have to go pick up the magazine if you crave more (and trust me, there's a lot more). I hope you'll enjoy, but don't let the stupidity of others make you feel too superior. Last time I checked, we all still fit into the "Human" category. ;) 

No Shirt/No Hands/No Service

A Florida bank refused to let a man born without arms cash his wife's check, even though he provided two forms of identification. The reason given: He couldn't provide a thumbprint.

Dumb Warning Labels

On a baby stroller: Remove child before folding.

On a brass fishing lure with a three-pronged hook on the end: Harmful if swallowed.

On a cartridge for a laser printer: Do not eat toner.

On a carpenter's electric drill: This product not intended for use as a dental drill. 

On a thermometer: Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally.

On a dishwasher: Do not allow children to play IN the dishwasher.

Cruisin' and Losin'

An IPod was stolen from a convertible outside a Walmart. The owner, said police, locked the doors, rolled up the windows, and turned on the alarm...but left the top down.

Ctrl+Alt+Stpd

The owner of a computer shop convinced a customer that his computer virus was part of an evil plot by Polish priests linked to the religious organization Opus Dei, authorities say. The priests were a threat to not only the man's family, he insisted, but also to the entire United States. The best safeguard: regular credit card charges amounting to some $6 million over six years paid to the owner of the computer shop--who insisted he was working with the CIA--to ensure protection from the priests. (The owner plead 'not guilty').

Wrong Team

In honor of Remembrance Day--when British Commonwealth countries honor their fallen veterans--the Scottish soccer team Airdrie United found the perfect photograph for its program cover: World War II era nurses handing water to grinning Allied troops. Accompanying it were the words Lest we forget and Supporting our heroes. It was very moving, even though it was actually a photo of World War II era German nurses handing water to grinning Nazi soldiers.

Dumb Celebrities

"That's why I don't eat friggin' lobster. Because they're alive when you kill it." --Snookie, Jersey Shore

On brushing her teeth: "I just use Listerine. Sometimes I'll use my sweater." --Jessica Simpson

Actress Taylor Momsen, when asked what she was doing to help Haiti after the devastating earthquake, "Right now, I'm trying to just finish my record and get through the last season of Gossip Girl. So not so much thinking about that."